Last night, a little before 4am, I heard soft whimpers coming from Saylor's monitor. It startled me, as she doesn't ever wake up at night. I watched her on the monitor for a few minutes, thinking she'd fall back alseep, but the whimpers continued. I walked upstairs to her room, scooped her and her blanket out of bed, then sat with her in her rocking chair.
Immediately the whimpers stopped. She sprawled her little body on mine and snuggled right into me. She held her blanket in one hand and held onto my arm with the other. I listened to her sucking on her paci. Then slowly, I watched as her chest rose and fell, her breaths getting slower as she quickly fell back asleep.
I sat in that chair, with only the glow of a night light, and tears enveloped me. I kept hearing a whisper in my heart, "you're gonna miss this....". I rocked and prayed as I soaked in every second. I don't even know how long I held her, but she was fast asleep when I finally got up from the chair and laid her back in her crib.
These moments are fleeting, and I am thankful to sit and rock my sweet baby in the wee hours of the night, and thankful for a God who whispered to me slowly, "stay, soak this moment in...".
So very true. I think I wished away time with Tyler. Couldn't wait for the next phase. With Ryan, I savor every second of the day because he is our last. It's amazing how children soften us as adults.
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